4/15 ..... one year later

I can't believe it's been a year since the Boston Marathon 2013.  It's definitely not how I imagined the day would end 1 year ago.  I remember exactly where I was when the bombs went off - I was reaching in a school bus window for my gear bag just a few hundred feet from the finish line of the marathon.  At the time, I had no idea that cannon-like sound and puffs of smoke were actually bombs.  I can remember walking right out of the finish corral and towards the subway to head back to my apartment that I was renting for the weekend.  I can remember finding the subway closed but that didn't seem unusual to me at the time.   I can remember hearing sirens from police and ambulance cars during my 2+ mile walk but at the time those sounds didn't seem unusual to me.   I can remember getting back to the apartment and the many messages on my phone of panic from my family and friends.  I can remember standing there talking to Ross, still feeling clueless and he said to me "You don't know what happened at the finish line of the marathon, do you?"  I can remember turning on the TV as I'm talking to Ross to see for the first time what was actually happening.  I can remember standing in the living room of the apartment for what seemed like the next 4 hours.... not moving, not showering, not drinking water, just standing and staring..... I can remember checking the lock on the door  about 1,000 times.  I can remember being so scared to draw back light, white  curtains of the apartment for fear of what might be out there.  I can remember hearing the sounds of the sirens for the next 8 hours or more on the streets outside the apartment.......I can remember eating a piece of bread with peanut butter on it after finally taking a shower around 8pm.  I can remember laying in bed, watching the same news report over and over and over again... still in disbelief.  I can remember finally falling asleep and waking up to the sound of the TV..... I can remember the restless night and waking up around 5am..... I can remember the feelings on thankfulness that I had ----- my legs were completely trashed and sore from the tough course of the Boston Marathon but I can remember being so thankful that I had both my legs.  I can remember staring at the light, white curtains in the apartment - afraid to draw them back to see what was going on outside..... I can remember the feeling as I put on my running shoes and walked up the stairs of the apartment to the ground level.  I can remember opening the door and peeking outside.... almost as if I was part of a war-themed movie.  I can remember the sounds on the street........ ABSOLUTE SILENCE...... eerily QUIET.  I can remember walking a couple blocks down the road to the convenience store to get some milk for my cereal and talking to the store clerk who was supposed to be downtown the day before with some friends celebrating the marathon and the Red Sox game.... I can remember the same store clerk telling me that one of his friends had lost a limb that afternoon.  I can remember him telling me that it could have been him and that his wife was pregnant.   I can remember packing up my belongings and heading toward the subway..... I can remember the police presence in the subway, the police dogs, and the SILENCE..... I can remember the flight home and the drive home from Chicago....

Today, I had a track workout and in between my intervals I stopped to get some water and looked down to notice my key chain.  my sis-in-law got this key chain for me the Christmas before the Boston Marathon.  I ran without headphones today, which is very unusual for me - but I needed that time to reflect.... for those who lost their lives, for those who were injured, for those than cannot run for now, and for my life that was spared that day because I am certain that I ran by those bombs that day on Boylston Street.... for the penny that I picked up at the start of the race in Hopkinton.... for the prayer that I said just before I started the marathon.....for the second chance that I was given.... I am forever thankful!

I won't be running the Boston Marathon 2014 --- I did qualify for the Marathon however due to the overwhelming response from runners, my qualifying time was not fast enough to get me in for 2014 (I qualified with a 3:39:40 but to be accepted this year, runners needed 3:38 in my age category).  I'm not going to lie, I was extremely disappointed when I found out about my rejection ---- but I turned that disappointment into something positive when I ran the NYC Marathon last November ---- I qualified for the Boston Marathon 2015 with a 20 minute and 1 second time buffer ------ I think that will get me in for 2015 :)